One time, there was a mother who complained about her son. He told me, her eldest son was the class V SD. He's stubborn, courageous mother denied. Only the father she feared. The mother was very surprised with his son's behavior. Their children often skipped school. Even in a week is often only in 3 days. Even the guardian class had several times come to the house to persuade him to return to school. As a general test any semester, the class guardian to bring about done at home. Son diligently watching television, but lazy to do the prayer.
Once upon a time, the mother went to her parents' house, a distance of 30 km from his home. This is done because it is very annoyed with his behavior. And feel burdened because they are not able to educate their children. And only the father and the child alone at home. Then the father told his son that his mother would not leave until the child pick himself and apologized. Heard his father say that, the boy and then riding a bicycle to her grandmother's house.
With this incident, the mother thought her son had changed. But unexpectedly, apparently the child back as usual. Still do anything that makes the mother and father overwhelmed.
The mother told me was in many ways done to "cure" this child. Frighten the child, that dare to parents is sinful and would later live and be tortured in hell. Even the psychologist had been, to a pack of Kyai also been done. What is suggested by the village elders to "mbancaki" are also quite done. But apparently her eldest son also did not change his condition.
Contained in the mother's mind is, how his son's future when teenagers, after the entry into junior high school or grow up, whether it will stay that way. Besides lessons in schools today are too difficult, whether the child could follow later with a good lesson.
Thrung thuung thung ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
I was shocked to hear this mother's story. I just took a deep breath. Oops .... How lightly the task of a mother. In my heart, I think ... ... ... duh, I've never been a mother, how about this dicurhati yes. : D But it's OK. This is how God mendewasakanku ... ... ... ... ... And I was challenged as well. How to cope with children like this. Although not married, does not mean it is forbidden to write about it? : D
I tried to read books about child rearing. Art Educate Children's Dr. Without Violence. Muhammad Fahd Ats-Tsuwaini. Something attracted me to pick it up from the book. He wrote, there are some things that cause children against their parents. Include:
misunderstanding and lack of
Occasionally, according to parents, the command given to children is clear and straightforward. But apparently, not so according to the child. Children feel less understanding of what was ordered by her parents. Children are then came and apologized and asked what was meant by the parent. Usually kids like this, because it was concentrating on other things, for example: eating, playing, working on homework, etc..
How to deal: When a child carried away with "world" then, repeat the command, or host sediki sound and touch him until he remembered, and then repeat the command without any emotion or anger. Sangkalah be kind to him, that he did not deliberately. Be suspect of the Muslims is obligatory, especially against children.
Looking for attention and support
Could be, disobedient child because she wanted to get attention from their parents. This could happen, either because the child was rarely observed and only when there is a dialogue that is not true in children.
How to overcome: to find a motive, why do kids do that and continued with the transfer orders to other children or do their own job. Thus, the child will be forthcoming. Listen to him. This step should also be at the right time to find the cause of a child seeking attention.
Procrastination
Sometimes children deliberately refuse to do something immediately. He had promised to implement. He had put it off until she felt ready to carry out the order. This can be caused due to incompetence, lack of appropriate ways of governing, or lazy and tired.
How to deal: Sometimes children feel unable to work because not strong, not to mind, or because of embarrassment. For that, understand that the opposition may be an expression of disability. Sometimes parents also gave orders to the child regardless of the situation, or when children feel tired. For that, look at the conditions, if the child is tired, may take some time to implement the state is not forced.
Refusing Parents Without command for
Sometimes children refuse to do something and show that "I do not want". In this case, there are several ways to deal with, among others:
o Teach children the meaning of obedience in terms of preferred or despised for not in disobedience
o Use a good way and appropriate when asked
o Using the words of polite when told
o Understanding the barriers children if such a situation
o Describe different opinion because when a child or explaining the benefits for parents and children in executing the command
o Describe any other causes that can draw closer the distance between children and parents, especially in terms of devotion to parents and the reward will be earned.
It was probably not easy to do all that. But there are things that motivate to educate children in such a way, to be sholeh child. How her happy to have children who sholeh. A very valuable asset, which makes the reward will not be interrupted even if the spirit has been separated from the body.
To educate children to be children who sholeh, qurrota A'yun, not enough just to one child pedagogy, but there are many things that are also needed.
read more...
Today, many use social networking to communicate between communities or between individuals. When in Indonesia today is a face book as a communication bridge social networking, but we Taukah what is most popular in Europe today? muxlim. Yeah right muxlim. Social networking is one of Finland is the recommended for Muslims around the world, but not close the possibility for non-Muslims juga.Muxlim many facilities offer a pleasant enough. But most important is the value of modesty and communications world. In addition to value modesty in communicating via the Internet, muxlim also offers many amenities. For more details, please visit www.muxlim.com. For other news can be found here read more...
Many of us underestimate the prayers. Therefore, through this paper we will try to explain the laws on compulsory prayer berjama'ah, because the real problem is the all-important issue.
Allah SWT said many calls sha-lat in the Holy Qur'an Karim. This indicates that important case. Allah SWT says:
Steadfast in prayer, give regular Charity, and rukuklah with those who bow. (Al-Baqarah: 43)
This noble verse is about the obligation nass prayers.
And in the letter al-Nisa 'Allah says which means:
And if you are among them (friends) and you want to establish the prayer along with them, then let a party of them stand (prayer) with thee, and carry guns, and then when they (the prayers be with you) su-shape (has serekat perfect), the hen-daklah them from behind (to face the enemy) and should come second group that has not pray, then they bershalatlah with you, and let them be on the alert and carry guns ... (An-Nisa '102)
In the above verse Allah obliges sha-lat congregation of the Muslims in the war circumstances distinction. What if in a state of peace?!. Already mentioned above that should come .. and the second party had not pray, then bershalatlah with you .... This is the proposition that the prayer in congregation is far-dhu 'ain, is not obligatory kifayah, or sunnah. If legal Fardhu kifayah, congregational obligation must fall for the second group because the first group of redemption. And if the law is the Sunnah, surely the main reason is because of fear.
And in Saheeh Muslim from Abu Hurayrah said:
A blind man came to the Prophet and said: Messenger of Allah, I do not have the leads that will lead me into the mosque. Ma-ka he asked for leniency for prayer at home, then given a dispensation. Then he left, he called him and said: Did you hear adzan? Yes, he said. The Prophet said: Then fill (Attend)!
In this hadith the Messenger of Allaah be upon wassallam not provide relief to Abdullah ibn Umm Maktum radi 'anhu to pray in his house (not in congregation) although there are reasons, including:
- The situation he was blind.
- The lack of guidance to the mosque.
- Away from Masjid house.
- The palm trees and others that there is between his house and mosque.
- The existence of wild animals in Medina.
- Old age and have weak bones her.
Abu Hurayrah that the meri-wayatkan that the Prophet peace be upon wassallam has said:
I intend ordered the Muslims to establish sha-lat. So I ordered one to be a priest and prayed together. Then I leave for the Muslims who carried a bundle of firewood to the people who do not want to come to pray in congregation, and I burn their houses. (Al Bukhari-Muslim)
Above hadith have explained that the determination Messenger of Allaah be upon wassallam to burn the houses because they did not come out for prayers at the mosque. And many more hadith which describe the Prophet stern warning against those who did not attend the mosque for congregational not solely because of their prayer, they even prayed in their homes.
Ibn Hajar said: This hadith has been explained that the prayer in congregation is Fardhu 'ain, because if the prayers were only just Sunnah, the Prophet would not act against those who leave, and if Fardhu kifayah must have enough to work with him and the him.
Abdullah ibn Mas'ud radi 'anhu said: You've seen us, not someone who left the prayer in congregation, except he was a hypocrite who knows nifaknya or a sick person, even one who sakitpun walking (with supported) between the two men to come to pray ( prayers in the mosque). He emphasized: The Messenger of Allaah be upon him taught us wassallam streets of guidance, and one way of guidance it is prayer in the mosque (who pray at the mosque do). (Saheeh Muslim)
Ibn Mas'ud said: Whoever would like to meet with Allah SWT at the end of the day later in a Muslim state, should maintain all the prayers that are called by Him. God Almighty has set the streets to the Prophet's guidance and prayers including one way of guidance. If you sha-lat at home then you have to leave the Sunnah of the Prophet, and you will be lost. Every man who purification well, and then to the mosque, Allah SWT will write every step of the good, picked it up one degree, and delete a crime. You've seen among us, there never was a prayer (in congregation), except a hypocrite who has appeared nifaknya. Once there was a man comes with a guided between two people to set up rows.
Ibn Mas'ud, Abdullah Ibn Abbas and Abu Musa Al-Ash'ari radi 'anhum said: Anyone who heard adzan then he does not come without udzur, then there is no prayer for him.
Commander of the Faithful Ali ibn Abi Talib said: There are no neighbors except the mosque to pray in the mosque. When asked to him: Who neighboring mosque? He said: Anyone who heard the call adzan. Then he said: Whoever heard adzan calls and he does not come then there is no prayer for him, unless he has udzur.
Abandon prayer in congregation is one of the causes for leaving the prayer at all. And keep in mind that prayer is kufr, and out of Islam. This is based on the words of the Prophet: The line between someone with kufr and shirk is prayer. (Narrated by Muslim). Promise between us and limit the unbelievers is prayer. He who left, according to the ruling.
Every Muslim must keep praying on time, doing the prayer that is prescribed in accordance with God, and working in congregation at the houses of God. Every Muslim must obey Allah and His Messenger, and fear of the wrath and siksanya.
There was no denying the prayer in congregation has some wisdom and benefit. Wisdom that looks are:
- Will arise among Muslims will recognize one another and help each other in goodness, faith, and mutual intestate with truth and patience.
- Mutual encouragement to others who had left her, and provide teaching to the ignorant.
- Fostering a sense of hypocrisy tidak-suka/membenci.
- Show syiar-syiar God amidst His servants.
- Support mission in words and deeds.
Hadiths about the necessity of prayer walking and maah implement obligations in the house of God very much, therefore every Muslim must pay attention, and hasten to do it. Also shall notify this to the children, families, neighbors, and all my friends seaqidah that they carried out the orders of Allah and His Messenger and that they were afraid of the prohibition of God and His Messengers and that they distanced themselves from the properties despicable hypocrite, of whom dianta lazy to do the prayer
read more...
Ideal woman, they are willing to live on this earth to serve as Alloh, pursue a life by holding on to the Qur'an and Sunnah, to understand the meaning of creation itself in this world. Women are the most beautiful jewelry that feels its beauty when the love is based by the liver and Alloh alone, not the love of passion and the dregs of mind alone.
Allow me to write the criteria most beautiful woman worthy dream in the hearts back to get rindho Divine.
* Covering Aurotnya because Alloh.
"Asma Binte Abu Bakr had met Allah's Apostle wearing thin clothes. Word Apostle: O Asma! Truly a girl who has not berhaid limbs menzahirkan him except his wrists and face alone. "Bukhari and Muslim History.
"O my daughter Fatimah! As for the women who would hang his hair until his brain to boil them in hell is it in the world does not want to close her hair than visits by non-mahram men. "Bukhari and Muslim.
* Maintain honor.
"Who are the woman who wears perfume then passes through a people so that they smell it, then she had considered doing adultery, and every eye was adultery." Nasaii History, Ibn Khuzaymah and Hibban.
* Helper and obedient to her husband
Helper and obedient to her husband, namely to understand the task and the meaning of creation to himself. "Every woman who helps her husband in matters of religion, then Allah will admit him into heaven ahead of her husband (10,000 years)".
* Lowering view
"And say to the believing women, let them subdue some of the scenery." An Nur: 31.
Ntar plus, wait yes. Ngetiknya tired again ... ..
We often went climbing in the beauty of this world, we are trapped in a situation where we forget the love that should be given the artificial beauty that looks right superficial existence. But in reality, I was only able to pray Alloh may provide for His servants who missed one of the few women in this world dreams. Amin ya Alloh
read more...
